You will have to forgive me that I remember almost no names of places we were.

Epicon for me was something of a surprise, to others and myself. A lot of folks thought that I was yanking their chains about coming, because I posted my big announcement on April Fool's Day, but I had been talking to Chip and #20 about arranging crash space for quite a bit. I also found out about this awesome student fare during Spring Break on Greyhound so I had to go for it.

When I rolled into New Orleans the only thing of real interest for me was a SHOWER! Did not want to o-fend my new playmates. :)

#20 picked me in his Jeep/circus clown car, it's powers of infinite capacity as yet unknown to me, and dropped me off at his place on his lunch break where I partook of a cool Abita Golden and a hot hosedown (By the way Kevin, I forgot some of my shower stuff there, in case you guys were trying to figure out whose Pantene and Lever2000 that was).

So I get to the Columns several hours after the first planes are supposed to have landed. I am thinking that everyone is already bonded and I am gonna have to do some thing really outrageous to be noticed, but instead...Nothing.

I am told by the lady at the desk that only one person in the Epicon party had checked in. I knew that was Cheryl, my superior Midwest brain having figured this by logical analysis despite the clerk's refusal to give me any names, although the confirmation of her and Wayne walking in as I was heading out to the verandah was nice too. :)

The three of us went outside to get aquatinted; thinking all of the flyers would be arriving any second. In the TWO HOURS (last time I mention it guys, honest. :) We waited for them to arrive, I got to play around with their digital camera, defend my anti-corporate leanings, and get a bit of career advice. All of which was quite nice, even though my stomach was making funny noises at me.

About the time we were considering sending out search parties, folks started showing up. Turns out somebody's flight was late (Vic's?), AND THEY DECIDED TO STOP LUNCH! GRRRRR! (That wasn't my voice responding to the news, it was my stomach).

Ah, well, I got to witness the single best job of parallel parking I had ever seen in my life. Give it up for my man, DJDave, ya'll, the dude put a sedan into a parking space that wasn't more than 5 inches larger than his car. (Too bad they had to move it 10 minutes later, they had parked right out in front of the hotel)

Then the pageant began!

Ah, the women of Epicon!

Jen-Jen! Griffin! Meloney (who didn't arrive until Saturday!)!
Angels of the Internet!

TOGA! Ri! And the already arrived Cheryl!
Webmasters of my heart!

Forget the Alamo! Remember the best from Texas!
(In all lowercase even!)
koolblu! ella! songbyrd!

And Grandma! GRANDMA! I got to meet Grandma! (doing the dance of joy!)...

...oh yeah, and there were some guys there too.

We spent quite a while out on the verandah, chatting, before we finally headed for dinner. I think noises my stomach was making were interrupting the conversation too much :)

Dinner was fun, I got some really wet catfish and began what was an almost hopeless quest to find a Miller Genuine Draft in the Big Easy. I also got tortured by ella, who ordered a HUGE tray of crawfish and then proceeded to demolish the poor things...despite my doing little high pitched screams of pain and crawfish voices saying "Help me! HELP MEEEEE...ARRGHHK". I think it just encouraged her.

After dinner I was the only one to witness koolblu beat the crap out of Paladin. (There, I said it Kim, can I have my chili now?)

On to the bar, where a lot of us spent several minutes trying to figure out who all of the caricatures were that was on the wall. (Hey Jen, I still think that was Martin Sheen) Then we all got the third degree by Ri, who I think needs to be installed as new poll taker, I really liked her questions, though I think people know far too much about me for my own good now.

ella continued her culinary torture on yours truly, somehow convincing me to try an oyster (warm, spicy, rubberized snot, mmmmMMMM good!) though I did get a back-rub out of it. That woman is VERY good with her hands.

Jas had his pool cue with him so we thought would be able play a few friendly tables. Of course, this was before Paladin came over and started doing Mizarach imitations on us. He had beaten Jas, Victor and me before I decided it was time to cheat. While he was playing Kim, I sent ella over to distract him. She really liked her work. He managed to still win, but seeing him turn pink and catch himself making wandering glances when ella would lean over the table was more than worth it to me :)

After we closed down the bar, we decided to go back and close down #20's house, he began transporting folks and some of the others started walking along the streetcar line.

I ended up hanging out with Paladin, koolblu, ella and songbyrd who decided to get some food. We eventually got a ride, and I began to learn the capacity mysteries of the little white Jeep, and how I was to benefit from them :)

This lesson came from my getting to share a seat with songbyrd on that ride. And I assure you it was quite necessary for me to hold onto her that way, for fear she would get thrown from the car with Kevin's driving. That I made the trip a bit more comfortable by resting my head where I did was incidental ;)

After a Jell-O shot and a whiskey at the house I passed out, I guess. I remember a few things, but I am not entirely sure if they all happened that night or Saturday night when there was a similarly interesting ride to Kevin's. Memories that stand out :

Lots of South Park

Lots of Jell-O shots

Not a lot of whiskey (#20 and I were the only ones who would partake)

Waiting for the Outlet to load for like ten minutes on Kevin's machine

Sitting on the porch swing with Jen-Jen (that may have been before dinner)

Getting Griffin a pillow because she looked uncomfortable sleeping on the floor, and failing to find her a quilt.

The look on Victor's face when I told him about my little love triangle problem. (this, I know happened Saturday)

ME- What is the worst thing you can think of to do that isn't illegal?

Victor-(confidant) Betray a friend's trust.

Wait a beat.

ME- How?

Victor-(still confident) sleep with his girl...(reading my face) You didn't!

Day 2

I wake up in a silent apartment with a sleeping bag draped over me to keep out the chill (thanks Jas). I don't really know what time it is and I can't get #20's entertainment system to work, so I quickly get bored and head over to the hotel.

Spent a nice morning talking to Grandma about her kids and eating a continental breakfast I didn't have to pay for on the porch, then went into the dining room and chatted with some other early risers and almost had a second one :)

I don't know what time we finally got going, but I do know it took a bit of doing. We planned to get in some sightseeing before lunch and meet at Cathedral Square so we could go somewhere to eat all together. Well, by the time we actually got a STREETCAR (Happy Chip?) down to the quarter and started our stroll down Bourbon Street we had to be in the Square *sigh*

So we didn't actually start sightseeing until after lunch, I had hit every bar that advertised Miller products that I saw, but none of them served Genuine Draft, including the restaurant we ate at, quite upsetting. They were so bad that they thought Icehouse was an IMPORT! HERESY! And the Jambalaya was cold too!

I did learn one interesting thing at that restaurant though, you are not supposed let someone shine your shoes in the French Quarter, or make a bet, or shake hands. ella and I discovered this sign that said so, and we asked the bartender about it. Seems there was a scam making the rounds in the Quarter, someone would ask to shine shoes and then tell he could bet you $10 that he knew where you got 'em. The scam is that you have them on your feet, on Bourbon St., New Orleans, LA, USA. Funny thing, I was passing this little tidbit on to Jen-Jen the next day while we were sightseeing and not ten seconds after I finished explaining it, I got hit up by a street hustler for the scam! Jen was shocked too, I couldn't have set it up any better if I had been trying.

Anyway after lunch we split up, I wanted to see this Aquarium I had seen in a TV show a few weeks back and I had convinced Jas, Cheryl and Wayne to go with me. We stopped by the Hard Rock on the way and I got a T-shirt, but I didn't get to see the fish. The line was like a mile long and if I am gonna wait that long and pay $10.50 to see a fish there had better be some fries and a lemon wedge with it.

Jas and I headed back into the quarter, Cheryl and her hubby went to a flower show (natch). I was getting thoroughly annoyed with my lack of success at finding a MGD, but I did get a cool hat. (No, not the Jester's cap, the one Jas is wearing in that pic is mine) We found Vic, Ri and Jen-Jen at Reverend Zombie's and looked around while they were finishing their readings.

Cool place, I almost got a bandanna.

On the way back to the streetcar line, I finally spot the holy grail! I, LITERALLY, run inside to confirm what the neon outside advertises, MGD! $4 for a 20oz cup? I don't even care, set me up. I walk outside grinning ear to ear. The group sees me leave the bar with the beer in my hand and immediately there looks change from questioning to understanding, I have trained them well :)

We head back to the hotel to collect everyone for dinner, and I am in high spirits, Meloney has arrived and boy, is she cute! ;)

Anyway, on to dinner, and I FINALLY have a decent Cajun dish. The gumbo was fantastic! I even tried a home brew at the restaurant that was actually very good, I forget what though.

After dinner I am feeling quite good, excellent dinner conversation, good food, nice place. I had to show my gratitude, so I gave V-Chip a kiss, TWICE. Now, I am not one to toot my own horn guys, but just between you and me, I think I had an effect on him. He was speechless for a full minute, take THAT ladies! :)

It was about this time though that the bad news sunk in, somebody had bungled the supplies and we were gonna be without Paladin Margaritas this event. The Milwaukee Kid was gonna miss his chance to taste this infamous concoction.

I DON'T THINK SO! I pooled the funds of several folks and we got the necessary ingredients (sorry if I strong-armed anybody). From "the REAL Uptown Superstore" no less. I guess the Big Easy has a problem with all knock-off lame-o stores Downtown :) anyway...

Paladin's margs were as good as I expected, better even, but despite the fact that we had some lunatic bachelor party going on in the hotel, the group was starting to crash out. I managed to talk Chipster into driving me out to the Quarter to catch up with the hard party crowd that had foregone margaritas for daiquiris, and I was not disappointed.

I knew it was gonna be a good cap on the evening when I walked in and Jen-Jen took a firm hold of me (a wonderful thing, in and of itself) and showed me that the daiquiri place served MGD too!

Woo Hoo! (I know I mentioned this before, but were you all aware there was a little 'happy-kick' that went along with this saying? I swear, some of more interesting mental images I got that weekend were some of the rest of you guys doing that kick :)

We had quite a fun time at the daiquiri bar, and those glasses were practically obscene! Of course, Ri HAD to have a matching set :)

DJ Dave even earned my forgiveness for bailing on me at the original meeting spot. (It took two trips and six pages to find these guys, thanks again Chip)

We had a GREAT chaperone in the personage of Victor, who stayed sober and did his best to keep us from getting kicked out of New Orleans, and a great guide in #20, who did his best to get us arrested :) Including cramming us into the demonic jeep. Jas had it a lot worse than I did though, he didn't have Meloney to keep him warm, and he had to worry about not squishing the lot of us in the back seat.

Day 3

In the morning we had a great breakfast, talking and chatting and preparing to say some of our good-byes, actually, we had unknowingly already said some, TOGA and Squire couldn't make that last meal together :(

When returned to the hotel some of made a quick foray back into the Quarter, before Meloney and Paladin had to catch their planes. I had wanted to see Victor and Jen-Jen onto their planes, but Kevin's jeep had used the last of it's magic and I had to say my good-byes at the hotel. DJ Dave and Griffin also left, they had quite the roadtrip to make back to the east coast.

This left Jas, Wayne, Cheryl, ella, koolblu, songbyrd and Grandma to join me at dinner that night. (5:3 girl to guy ratio, I think I can handle that :) We had even outlasted our hosts, V Chip and #20, who begged off to get some real sleep. (wimps! ;)

You have already heard everything you need to about our very INTENSE waiter (who seemed to ALWAYS be standing RIGHT over my shoulder) but let me say that he did provide Grandma with the best straight line of the weekend.

After we had all made drink orders for various soft drinks, Grandma ordered a white wine, the waiter asked the general question to validate our order, "Anything else from the bar" and Grandma politely but firmly replied "No, they've all been drinking enough this weekend."

I am gonna finish this quickly because I really don't want to recount to much of the rest, but good-byes were said to some special folks and really just wanted to thank you all for a great vacation.

That's my take